The Shot Glass is Half Empty

Ok 10 days 5 and 5 even Steven... But, The bad was really bad.

The reason for the title in this entry is a recent story from my roommate... It was a Wednesday night and I cooked some food for dinner... Nothin fancy but cooking none the less. I ate and cleaned up... after my clean up my roommate came home and we chatted for a little bit while she was putting groceries away. The next day at 5:45 pm (while i was getting ready to do my sports show) my roommate called me ... and she was pissed. She said while i cooked the night before I had knocked a shot glass a friend bought for her on to the ground and broke it into pieces... NOW, I don't remember breaking it... and further more I think that we would of noticed that I broke it while were in the kitchen that night... not 18 hours later. On top of that, We put waaaaaaaay too much value on to things because someone bought it for us... Things are things and people are people. Take your heirlooms and stick em up your cock hole... wearing a bad sweater that your grandma bought you to be polite is fine... being emotional if that piece of shit sweater gets snagged and ruined is dumb.

Orlando Sucks
I took a weekend to go to Orlando and pick up a couch... Jefe was kind enough to give a couch that is in a spare home there... The issue happened when I showed up there and the key didn't work in the deadlock... I don't blame him ... He was kind enough to offer the couch and he wasn't aware of any lock issues... What made the trip suck cock is that mine didn't get sucked... Orlando is a hot sticky mess and I usually can off set that with getting my balls licked... That didn't happen... fuck Orlando

Mock Murder
If I could trick a girl into thinking I am a serial killer I would... Let me rephrase... If I could trick a girl into thinking I am a serial killer, with out ending up in jail, I would... I think it would be a hoot... kinda like candid camera. OK, let me run down my dream scenario ... I would like to get a chick to really want to sleep with me... Tell her how hot it would be if I could tie her up or use cuffs on her... get her all set and then have a friend pop out of the closet... Now we will get into the dialog of the situation.

Cast:
Guy 1 = Me
Guy 2 = My friend
Yappy Bitch = Yappy Bitch (who thinks she is getting murdered)

Guy 1 - The cuffs aren't too tight are they?
Yappy Bitch - No they are fine... This is so hot I can't wait
Guy 1 - Me either... ok she is secured you can come out.
Yappy Bitch - What? Who are you talking to?
Guy 2 walks out of the closet with plastic tarp and a roll of duct tape
Yappy Bitch - Who are you? whats going on here!?!
Guy 1 - Shut your fucking face, we have business to talk about!
Guy 2 starts duct taping tarp up on the walls and windows, much like what is suggested in case of nuclear fall out
Guy 1 - Ok how do you want to do this?
Guy 2 - I wanna chop her foot off and bore out a hole with a drill and fuck her stump
Guy 1 - Not again... lets be original this time
Yappy Bitch - Oh please let me go... I won't tell anyone I swear... Do you want money? My parents are very rich... The will give you any...
Yappy bitch goes silent from a old gray sock being stuffed into her mouth by guy 1
Guy 1 - Are you fucking serious... That is the most hacky plea to live I have ever heard... Ok where were we
Guy 2 - I was telling you I wanted to fuck her stump...
Guy 1 - Why? Lets take a spade shovel to her back and fuck that hole
Guy 2 - Seems a little messy
Guy 1 - More messy than her ankle stump?
Guy 2 - Yea
Guy 1 - ok good point
Guy 2 starts drawing blue cut lines all over yappy bitches body
Guy 1 starts up the hand held carving knife
Guy 2 takes the sock out her mouth
Yappy Bitch starts screaming
Guy 1 and 2 start screaming in a mocking tone at yappy bitch
Guy 1 - Syke... har har we were joshing with ya...
Everyone one has a good laugh and goes to play mini golf

36" in all

Where do I start....

Its actually been pretty good lately...

12 days... 8 good and 4 bad... so 36" over all

No Cable...
I am completely moved in to my new apartment... Bigger room, more time to myself, and not bad eye candy 1 door down... The one bad thing is no cable... fuck... I have been reduced to watching "Tales From the Crypt" online ... I have fond memories of that show and my memory is where it should of stayed... with an exception to a few episodes that are brilliant (including the pilot) that show sucked a Shaq sized cock... The acting is the only horrifying part of that show, the effects look like an abortion, and that fucking crypt keeper's jokes annoy the piss out of me... I imagine that they crypt keeper is all that is left of Tom Hanks' character in Philadelphia ... Fuck the crypt

Wearing headphones while jacking off...
I hooked up my computer, got the lube out, and punched up my favorite site... Then realized I don't have computer speakers.... Shit.... So i dug up my over sized radio headphones and slapped them on... so there I sit cock in hand and headphones on my ears that are the size of my fists... I looked like a Mongoloid

Those are really the 2 bads the rest was pretty good...